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It's Sunday. I'm bored. I'm in EasyInternet cafe. What do I do? I type a large post full of fun and thrills and excitement. I go out in a blog of glory...

Past
It's been hard, you know. I don't particularly want any sympathy but just thought I'd let you know the past 9 months or so have been hard. Most of my life I've been generally lazy, and have always had my parents' financial support etc. I'd never had a proper job (except numerous paper rounds as a kid) and to suddenly decide last November to go out and become self-sufficient in the "big, bad world" was a big step. Mind you, I had to, as I was getting completely fed up. That initial move into the student flat in the west end seems like a lifetime ago! So much has happened since then (by my standards). In a month I'll probably be in my 4th different house in 10 months. In 2 months I'll probably have a new job (my 5th in 11 months). I just wish things would settle for me instead of all this moving around but it's all down to my choices and the circumstances I've found myself in. I think I have been stressed recently, this emphasised by the intense 12 hour shifts I've been working in my current job.

Things have been ok in general. It could be a damn sight worse. In the flat it's been ok. My flatmate has been making his efforts, and I think getting an overdraft at the bank was a good thing for him. He's now paid off the rent, and his debt to me, his uncle etc. He called the council to discuss a payment plan for all the outstanding tax. He says he'll sort out the bills. He says he's getting not only a bonus but also a payrise, from £6 to £9 an hour - not bad for an 18-year old - that is if he's telling the truth. Things are looking good and I'm no longer worried about the flat arrears as I was before. Shagger hates his job but is very good at it apparently, and if you do well in sales, there's a lot of financial rewards to be had. There's no love lost between us. He is a decent wee guy but just has a lot to learn and some growing up to do. All he seems to need is someone to tell him where he's going wrong and he's willing to make the effort.

As I said before, I lost my phone. As my birthday is coming soon, my mum took me out shopping in Glasgow, to get me a new phone as an early present. When I went to the o2 shop I was told that if I wait 2 months I'll be eligible for an upgrade from o2, if I renew my contract for 12 months. This would mean getting a brand new phone for nothing! Obviously I decided to wait. On the same day I also had a chat with my mum about what I'm doing and where I'm going in general and that was encouraging. I'd received a new SIM card and was now faced with the dilemma of how to get a useable phone for the next 2 months. I have an old Orange one (purchased on 9/11 - just before the Twin Towers fell - that's how I remember) - 4 years old and already an antique. I took it to "Carfone Repair Centre", under the Central Station bridge, but they said they couldn't unlock it as was too old. This meant it was likely I'd be without a phone for a while. When I checked my online bill at work, I found that I'd been the victim of fraud and that someone had run up a £6 phonecall which I'd have to pay for - bastard! Just as well I got it barred when I did or the damage could've been much worse.

Present
Now to the present; my friend Martyn (just out of hospital) paid a surprise visit the other day, upon hearing that I'd lost my phone. With him he'd brought 2 phones (which he'd found when he worked at the cinema). Both were o2 compatible. The first one I tried but as it had been reported lost, the handset was barred. Yesterday I took it to the place under the bridge but they said the bar couldn't be removed - hence it was no use. The second one was ok, a Sony Ericsson. However I couldn't use it as my SIM card was needing activated. I called o2 customer service on Friday to activate it - they said it'd take up to 24 hours. 24 hours later, it still wasn't active. I called again and they said it'd take an hour. An hour later, I called again, only to find it'd take a further 24 hours. 24 hours later, still no active SIM - I called today, (the 4th time) only to find they'd activated the wrong SIM serial number! f**king call centres! I now understand why some customers get so damn frustrated! Anyway, My SIM's now active and I have a phone I can use it with. Martyn Lyall, I know you don't read this, but thank you - you are fantastic! That's what friends are for etc.

As regards the flat, it looks as if Shagger has taken care of the arrears and has consolidated his debt into one single, affordable monthly payment, in the form of his overdraft. However, I think I may be leaving the flat at the end of September (we're going to extend the lease until the 22nd), as it's just too expensive for me on £6.15 an hour. I have nothing against Shagger - he's a nice guy and has really made the effort recently, but I just don't want to spend over half my earnings on accomodation, and so I think I'll be looking elsewhere, preferably for a place with at least 2 others - this would bring the council tax cost down. I will miss the penthouse and the location (in terms of local conveniences) is second to none. However, I need to get my priorities right, and besides I enjoy looking at/moving into new places. Shagger has decided to stay indefinitely as the move is too much hassle for him and he should be able to comfortably afford it once he's got a pay rise. Me moving out means he'll have to advertise for a new flatmate. We'll still keep in touch anyway. Before I go, I'll be wanting to have a large party (our long awaited "flatwarming"), as a celebration of my time there. I can't believe it's been nearly 6 months!

I was eventually wanting to get contact lenses, but have decided to opt for a new pair of specs instead, with those lenses which darken when exposed to bright light. This kind of lense is what I need, especially given my recent eye problems and prolonged exposure to computer screens and neon lights (in the call centre). A friend from work got laser eye surgery but I think I'll settle for getting contacts eventually. I think laser surgery is a bit more drastic than I find necessary. I went to Optical Express and they do a free pair of prescription sunglasses in addition to the main pair. Honest, I'm not advertising!

In general the job's been ok, but I'm not particularly enjoying it. I feel worn out by the 12-hour shifts and despite the days off, I still feel like a zombie once the shift is over. I'll soldier on though and try to derive as much positivity from it as I can (if that is actually possible).

I saw the final of Big Brother the other night. I've watched a lot of this series and thought Anthony was a deserved winner (the best of a bad bunch?), despite seeming like quite a simple guy. Either he was playing it safe or being himself but I think anyone that can put up with Craig in such a confined space deserves to win! I'm glad Makosi didn't win as I found her really annoying!

What else have I been up to? Well, apart from those soul-destroying stints in the call centre, not much. I recently bought a couple of books/magazines; "Touching From a Distance", about Ian Curtis, frontman of Joy Division, who killed himself, and a graphic novel about the life of Kurt Cobain, frontman of Nirvana, who also killed himself - nice, uplifting bedtime reading! Musically, I've been listening to the likes of Joy Division and Air - a strange combination, I know, but that's just me.

Future
And now to the future - Suzi is trying to arrange a week in Ibiza for the closing fiestas (parties) and so if she can book it I'll go. I just feel the need to go somewhere like that - it's an incredible place, if a little on the expensive side.

As I said I'll be looking for another flat soon. Although the lease ends for me on 22nd September, I'll start looking around the end of August (just after my birthday). I'm keen to move back to the west end. I'll aim to have the party around the middle of September, so will start inviting around the 22nd August - put a date in your diary!

As for the job, I don't think I can last more than 2 months more in Goldfish. If I want to preserve my soul, I'll have to start looking elsewhere soon. It's probably more the 12-hour shifts that are putting me off rather than the job itself. Honestly, most days you come to the end and it feels like you've been there for days - not nice! The thought of Mon-Fri 9-5 seems very appealing to me at the moment! I'm not sure what to look for next but was considering even a degree-related job. Iain's brother Andy had applied to Graham Technology (who are keen to take ESE graduates), and I was considering applying also. If not, then it may be another call centre, or even bar work (worse pay, but more sociable and no neon lights/computer screens to burn my eyes out of their sockets). I'm discovering that call centres are not really for me. If I'm to be a corporate whore like 99.9% of the population then I'd rather be a corporate whore who can make a difference, not some corporate equivalent of a battery hen.

In the long term, there are certain things I want to do, such as get a laptop, learn to drive, pay off my student loan, write some songs etc, but only once I've settled into my new surroundings. I would like to go abroad at some point, but not just yet - I'm quite content in Glasgow at the moment. I know the city well and feel settled here. I won't stay here forever though.

I was thinking of trying to join a band soon as well - this would solve all my problems of what to do with my time off! In general though, I guess I'm hoping to make a few good decisions which will set me off in the right direction so as I can find the path to spiritual fulfilment (or something along those lines).