Back On Track?!

Seeing as it's the weekend I'll treat you to a recap on the prevailing week. It's been a long week, and quite stressful. Although I haven't yet been stuck into the development work at Mosaic, I've had to adjust to the early mornings and long commute. The first couple of days were very tough when it came to getting out of bed, but gradually I got used to it. On Sunday night I had no sleep, but the rest of the week, I got 6-8 hours per night, which was fine. However, what's been quite concerning is just how much my mood has been fluctuating. I don't mean mood swings during the day, but I mean from one extreme to the other on alternating days. To take an example, I felt fantastic on Thursday; so positive about the job, and everything else. Yesterday, I felt drained and couldn't really think straight. I was quite depressed. The differences in how I felt in the space of a day were just plain ridiculous. It was like the symptoms of bipolar disorder. However, not one to moan about such things, I've been through all this stuff before (a few times), and I'm sure it's simply down to the body having to readjust to a new routine, and hence not knowing whether it's coming or going half the time. On bad days, I've been thinking: "I can't do this... sitting in front of a screen all day, in an office, typing symbols on a keyboard... I'm such a geek... uuugghh... I can't concentrate at all...". On good days it's been like: "I'm in a good job, where I've developing systems which are useful in people's lives. I'm getting paid well, I do regular hours and get to use my creative side, problem-solving ability, and analysing ability. There are great career prospects. I've got free reign over what I work on, and I'm not in a call centre". That was just to demonstrate how my perception has changed from day to day. I prefer the second one! I know everyone has good days and bad days, but mine have been extreme to the point of being scary. However, I know that once I'm adjusted to the routine, my body and mind will stabilise and reach a state of equilibrium.

As far as the work goes, I've been assigned a few small projects to get me started and to break me in gently. In the meantime I've been reading up on C#, CSS etc and it's amazing how quickly all that wonderful knowledge gained at uni can come flooding back.

A major issue, of course, has been the travel. I'm sick already of the commute to East Kilbride. What bothers me most is that when travelling on the bus, I haven't found it relaxing (largely due to how busy and noisy it can be). I get fed up stopping at traffic lights all the time and just can't wait to get home. By the time I do, I don't have a lot of time to do much else. Also, the scenery is appalling (unless you like endless urban dereliction, roundabouts and traffic lights), and it must be one of the ugliest routes in the world (that is, of course, once you're out of East Kilbride). I've decided to start travelling by rail as of next week. This will probably cut down the commuting time and with a Zone Card will be reasonably cheap. The fact that there'd be a bit of walking involved means that not only will I get some exercise, but also I can go at my own pace, as opposed to waiting for a bus to go through some traffic lights. In the longer term, I'll probably move again, perhaps to the city centre or to another penthouse in the south side.

It's been tough. Not least because having constant access to a high-speed internet connection has made me vulnerable to the allure of Blast Billiards and this. Ooh la la. However, from now on, I'll have to avoid these temptations and actually (a la Craig G. Renton) start doing some work.